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301. Those 14 dollar pints of beer at the ACC can really mess up your judgement!!! - Brian Beischer, Red Wings fan

302. We were told that this was the WOMAN'S league! - Edmon Tonoilers, Oilers fan

303. It's Gretzky's fault, he high-sticked Gilmour. - Jeremy Kennedy, Canadiens fan

304. Our goal is to beat the Rangers at their own game by going Cupless for more than 54 years. - William Estes, Islanders fan

305. We couldn't get our heads out of our asses. - Seven O'Connor, Oilers fan

306. Our draft position was too low. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

307. Corson was our real leader. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

308. We offered Aki Berg for the top pick, but Florida turned us down. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

309. We were still distraught over the Russ Courtnall-John Kordic trade. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

310. We were too busy checking out the updates on Office Glen's site to practice. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

311. We missed church. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

312. Our coach and our GM had a big argument before Game 7. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

313. It's our nature to fold when the going gets tough. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

314. Don Cherry wasn't coaching us. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

315. Antropov's developing too slowly. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

316. When Corson left, he didn't take Tucker with him. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

317. Sundin had a broken stick. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

318. So far, the New York Rangers' model of "success" isn't working for us. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

319. We can't win without home-ice advantage in the playoffs. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

320. We were too busy calculating how much it would cost to buy Lumme out. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

321. Colaiacovo was supposed to be our saviour on defense this year. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

322. An angel of the Lord appeared to us and told us not to win. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

323. The Senators got bankruptcy protection from the league.  We're morally bankrupt, shouldn't that count for something. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

324. We found out the real reason Corson left was to become the Argo's new kicker. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

325. We didn't play against Ottawa. - Tyson Lindquist, Canucks fan

326. The Oilers wouldn't trade us Gretzky for our whole team.  At least then we would have had one good player. - Rob Dunnigan, Oilers fan

327. David Reddekopp stole our excuse book. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

328. Glen Wesley wouldn't re-sign with us. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

329. Robert Svehla is playing mind games with us. You know how we are at anything involving the mind. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

330. Our fans are mindless drones. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

331. We haven't smothered enough of our prospects lately. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

332. Jeff Farkas didn't pan out. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

333. Tucker is too small. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

334. Mogilny's number is too high. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

335. We were scared of Arvedson. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

336. Wade Belak is devoid of talent. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

337. We ate at McDonald's before the game. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

338. We tried to overpay Fedorov, but he didn't want to come here. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

339. We're the only team that actually thinks Marchment is a good defenceman.

340. Wesley left. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

341. We're not ready for Belfour to have an off year. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

342. Hasek came back. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

343. We were too intimidated by Colorado's offence. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

344. Domi doesn't fight anymore. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

345. Since Corson left, Tucker's been playing even worse than usual. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

346. We're another year older. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

347. Our owners don't have enough money. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

348. "Domi was gone for the night, so how could we get any goals?" Pat Quinn - Gordy Rattan, Canucks fan

349. Why bother winning? The entire Canadian media already kisses our ass for being the biggest losers in hockey! - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

350. Too busy thinking up excuses for losing to score any goals. - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

351. How are we supposed to win if the refs call a penalty every time we inflict a life threatening injury on other players? - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

352. Cujo isn't here to tackle the refs anymore. - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

353. Let's face it, we're not that bright. - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

354. "I didn't realize they were losers when I signed them to multi-million dollar contracts." Pat Quinn - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

355. "I didn't realize Pat Quinn was a loser when I signed him to a contract." Leafs Management - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

356. Someone replaced Pat Quinn's gum with a cockroach. - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

357. Our owners, the Teacher's Union, insisted we lose as a protest to the Ontario Government's education reforms. - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

358. Ah, what the hell. Just this once, losing was our own fault. - Jim Armstrong, Senators fan

359. Domi's big head wasn't allowed on the plane from Sweden back to Toronto since it's too big for his small little body. - Brian, Sabres fan

360. Ottawa and Montreal were the first Canadian teams on Hockey Night In Canada this season.  Isn't the CBC supposed to be biased and make US the centre of attention? - Brian, Sabres fan

361. Tie Domi is losing his 'goal scoring ability' because of the recent trade rumours. - Brian, Sabres fan

362. Dalton McGunity winning the election really threw us off our game. - Lucas Timmons, Senators fan

363. We were distracted by Don Cherry making out with his boyfriend, Don Cherry. - Brian, Sabres fan

364. Belfour lost his drinking buddy Shayne Corson. - Brian, Sabres fan

365. "I don't get paid enough to block shots." Mats Sundin - Tara Fulton, Red Wings fan

366. While watching the Wings, the Leafs were stunned by watching a real leader at work. - Tara Fulton, Red Wings fan

367. "But I thought we got points for assisting on a goal, no matter who scored it?" Ken Klee - Tara Fulton, Red Wings fan

368. Since we can't serve warm, overpriced beer from December 21st to 28th, how can our goalie have a merry Christmas? - Brian, Sabres fan

369. We weren't picked to play in the Outdoor Game, unlike better teams like Montreal and Edmonton - Brian, Sabres fan

370. "Oh, but you see, we LIKE being an embarrassment to all of Canada." Darcy Tucker - Carly Anderson, Senators fan

371. "I thought we were having 3 practice periods, it's true!" Ed Belfour - Carly Anderson, Senators fan

372. "We want to make all the other teams look bad, so we mess up! Wait, that doesn't make sense..." Mats Sundin - Carly Anderson, Senators fan

373. "The ref thought I was hurting my opponents, when I was actually embracing them with happiness! Those are TWO different things!!" Tie Domi - Carly Anderson, Senators fan

374. Domi was playing - Mack, Senators fan

375. It was that time of the month and we all were bloated and had cramps - David Bell, Canucks fan

376. Tucker has ADD (Ability Deficit Disorder) - Chris Tartaglia, Flyers fan

377. The Antropov injury really made Quinn have to juggle the lines - Chris Tartaglia, Flyers fan

378. Sundin figured, "Well the Vikings are out of the playoffs so..." - Chris Tartaglia, Flyers fan

379. Hockey sticks??? I thought these were walking canes...  God we're old and confused - John Currie

380. "My stick flew into the crowd all by itself." Mats Sundin - Darren, Canucks fan

381. Do you know how hard it is to reschedule a tee time in late April? - Chris Tartaglia, Flyers fan

382. "My stick broke... no, wait a minute... that was my hip." Gary Roberts - John Currie

383. We're still tired from this years Stanley Cup "PRIDE" parade rehearsal we had, "you try walking down Yonge St. in heels all day and see how you feel!" - Brian Malone, Senators fan

384. "The Prime Minister gave all our funding to the Canadiens during the Shawinigate affair." Pat Quinn - Ian Buller, Canucks fan

385. "I can't see through my visor!" Domi - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

386. We were upset when Leafhatred stopped posting. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

387. Winning just isn't in our DNA. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

388. We didn't spend enough money this year. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

389. Ah, it just takes too much effort. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

390. We don't like change. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

391. All the other teams have to win the Cup before we do again. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

392. Moronic fans, moronic team. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

393. "I'm jealous that Alfredsson can toss his stick better than me." Sundin - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

394. We have no chemistry. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

395. We show up, isn't that enough? - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

396. Mika Noronen's scoring prowess was too much for us. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

397. Reichel shoots better when it's his own net. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

398. We forgot that we change ends during the intermission. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

399. When the going gets tough, we get golfing. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

400. We have a fear of playing hockey in June. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

401. We enjoy blowing third-period leads to non-playoff teams. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

402. We play better without Mogilny. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

403. Fitzgerald was out of the lineup. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

404. McDonald's ran out of those little blue and white plastic Stanley Cups. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

405. We have a strong tradition of failing to meet expectations, why change that now? We got a good thing going. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

406. It'll upset the balance of the universe if we win. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

407. "THIS IS THE ACTUAL SEASON?!! I THOUGHT WE WERE STILL ON VACATION!!" Ed 'drunkman' Belfour - Sara Bansal, Canucks fan

408. Belfour's back went out after he fell off the bench with a 40 in his hand. - Brad Huysmans, loyal Canucks fan

409. GREG ADAMS! GREG ADAMS! GREG ADAMS! - Brad Huysmans, loyal Canucks fan

410. Rob Shick didn't give us enough powerplays. - Brad Huysmans, loyal Canucks fan

411. We were missing that final piece of the puzzle!  Although, according to that logic we should have built 6-7 full size puzzles by now! - Pawel Osiej, Canadiens fan

412. Too much experience and not enough skill! - Kevin MacIsaac, Senators fan

413. "The reason we didn't win is because we don't have: Sakic, Forsberg, Fedorov, Yzerman, Hejduk, Shanahan, Hull, Kovalchuk, Leclair, Bertuzzi, Naslund,...... in fact all we need is the top 16 forwards and the top 6 defensemen in the NHL and I think it'll be our year.  If we don't win, we'll just get more star players and hope this year we won't have to salute the leafs organization during THE PARADE on Yonge Street, the gay pride parade that is." Leafs fan - Sami Saraya, Canadiens fan

414. "Its because our Maple Leaf isn't Red" - Matthew Macaskill, Canadiens Fan

415. We were upset because we were the only Canadian team without a player on Team Canada. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

416. Boston stole Tom Fitzgerald from us! - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

417. The strike was causing us too much stress. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

418. The fans aren't loud enough. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

419. Brian Leetch is pathetic and overrated. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

420. We don't have Sebastien Centomo waiting in the wings anymore. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

421. Borje Salming doesn't want to play for us again. Too bad, we were gonna slide him into that #3 slot... - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

422. The rest of the country hates us. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

423. We trade too many draft choices. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

424. If there's a salary cap, we can't overspend on has-beens anymore. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

425. We went out looking for free agents, but there wasn't anyone at the old folks' home. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

426. We still thought Ron Francis had another 119-point season left in him. - David Reddekopp, Canadiens fan

427. "The nurse mixed up my Alzheimer pills with my sedatives!" - Andrew  Hamilton, Canadiens fan

428. "It's not our fault! We forgot to put on our jocks!" Pat Quinn - Nitish, Senators fan

429. We kept tripping over the blue line. - Julianne Oliveira, Not a Leaf fan

430. For the first time ever, we have a real excuse!!! There is no hockey this year! This is the first year since 1967 we won't lose the Cup! Let's have a parade! - Andre, Habs fan

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